As with many programming languages, it's very easy to find Perl code that can best be described as "write only". Cute tricks, short variable names, inconsistent spacing, dubious reliance on default arguments... Even without the added challenge of a whole extra embedded language (regular expressions), some Perl programs deserve to be referred to as line-noise. Yet Perl is a beautiful, expressive language that can be used successfully by novices through to experts to achieve powerful results; and, with a little extra preparation can be easy to read, fun to work with, and a joy to maintain. This talk will provide a lightning tour of the current status of Perl's best practices.